Fr. Frank Majka, SJ – The Bridge

Knowing and Not

The breviary is a collection of psalms and reflective readings for each day of the year, used primarily by priests and religious. Last week I was happy to find several selections from the writings of St. Augustine. The following short passage, in particular, stood out for me.

Augustine wrote:[I declare and confess to you, Lord,] what I know and do not know of myself. What I know, I know because you enlighten me; what I do not know, I shall not know until my darkness becomes as noon in your sight.

I felt Augustine uncovered something we all seem tempted by, namely the desire to fully know ourselves, what motivates us and who we are in our heart of hearts. But it is an illusion to think that we can attain such awareness in this life.

Of course, we do know some things about who we are and what makes us tick. Still, from time to time something usually happens that shows us things in us we hadn’t been aware of, things good and not so good. So, like it or not, we don’t fully know ourselves — or other people, either.

But that very realization can give us the impulse to put into God’s hands all we are at any given time, all we know and all we don’t, just like Augustine did. And though we have faith that someday we will learn the full truth about ourselves, that is not for us in this life but in the next one.

For now, we must live with the fact that, as St. Paul wrote, we see vaguely as in a mirror. But all is in God’s knowing and care, nonetheless. And that may help us treat ourselves and others with more kindness, love, acceptance, respect and tolerance.